Then for my village- my first day back to post after Gerewol I was unpacking and left a box of tampons out. My chief, Issa, came by to greet me on returning from my trip and pointed at the tampons and asked what they were. I avoided his questions but his curiosity took over and he kept asking. Finally I explained it to him- but that still wasn’t enough. I finally opened the tampon and showed him. The shock on his face made me laugh at what a funny cross-culture moment it was. But, seriously? Last time I leave tampons sitting out on my table!
The same chief that I was chatting with about tampons that day was also going through his second divorce. Why? His wife and him were fighting. His wife, Haoua, often brings her work to the next village over during the day to visit her family. But Issa didn’t agree that she could leave the house during the day- never mind the fact that Issa is constantly traveling himself and is really only at his house at nighttime. So a divorce is in the works. But he also doesn’t have much to worry about, given that in the Islam religion men are allowed to have up to 4 wives, Issa still has two more at home.
With my birthday this week I was explaining to my villagers that I would be a year older when they saw me next. They looked at me and said “Ni santo!” which translates to “You’re old and not married!”. For a language that only has 3 colors (black, white and red) it’s impressive they have a verb for “old and not married”.
Just before I left my village last weekend there was a meeting with about 15 men outside of my concession. Later I found out that it was a meeting to organize the wedding of my best friend, Kadija. Normally I’d be happier for someone getting married- but Kadija has already been married and when she divorced she decided she didn’t want to marry again. If you talk to Kadija about marriage, she’ll tell you she’s seen marriage, its awful because of how much the husband beats the wife and she never wants to get married again. Kadija is now in her mid-thirties and her dad, who is probably in his mid-seventies, decided it is not acceptable for her not to be married. So the father of the new groom came from another village came and paid her dowry, which was about $500, then they did the special blessing, without either the groom or bride present. And now it’s all in waiting until the marriage ceremony happens in the next few weeks….
All that and I milked a goat for the first time this week then made goat cheese with my villagers! The difference between American goat cheese and Nigerien goat cheese? In Niger, you pull goat hairs out of the cheese as you eat it.
And with that, my older sis, Kitty arrives today! Woohoo! And he’ll be dinner on Thursday….
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