Swimming with amoebas...

there are times that i wish i was sitting at home on my couch, watching tv, eating my mom's chicken noodle soup. those times are whenever I'm sick....i have amoebic dysentery, again....its horrible....pains shooting up your stomach, gas in your stomach, cramping....much less diarrhea constantly! and unfortunately shitting in a hole. just another day in niger. BUT, saw the doc, got some meds, and it's off to the pool...

Marry me?

Here's to a quick example conversation I have with Nigerien men on a regular basis on the topic of: Marriage. Never thought I'd have to deal with marriage proposals, nearly every day. So here's a sample conversation, keeping in mind that Islam allows men up to 4 wives. So they're always looking for more...

Nigerien Male: Hi white person! How'd you sleep?
Me: In health. How's the body?
NM: In health. How's your house?
Me: The house is thankful. How's your wife?
NM: She's thankful. How's your kids?
Me: I don't have any kids.
NM: No kids? Why?
Me: I don't need kids.
NM: You're married?
Me: No.
NM: Great! Let's get married! Take me to America!
Me: No, I don't want you.
NM: Why?
Me: You are ugly!
NM: You're uglier than me! Let's get married.
Me: You don't want me, I don't have strength. I can't pound like the women here and I won't cook for you. I don't know how to sweep. Plus, if you marry me, you must get rid of your other wives.
NM: It's okay, let's get married.
Me: But you have no money. I have a very high bride price.
NM: I have lots of money, let's get married. Take me to America.
Me: If you find 100 camels then I will marry you.
NM: 100 camels! God is BIG! You have truth. Goodbye ugly.

Amerik

One day of teh past few weeks I decided it's time to bring America to Babagade Koira. I started with showing teh pictures I brought. My villagers were mostly interested in staring at my parents. When they saw teh picture of my three sisters and I, they had no idea which one i was, picking me out last. I guess i did have short, straight, clean hair. Later I brought out a few magazines to try to emplain that Americans like to be thin. Instead everyone was shocked to see legs/stomach. When they saw a picture of a girl in a bikini everyone kept saying "That's not good". The difficulty is explaining to my villagers that they dress teh way they do because they're Islamic, and that the entire world doesn't dress like taht.
Next on the trip to America is corn. I thought corn was universal: you eat it. Nigeriens, however, eat corn by pounding it to a flower, cooking it, then adding an okra (slime) sauce. Not exactly culinary delight. So, I bought a couple cans of corn from the annasara grocery store and cooked tehm up. When people saw it, they stared and once again, "God is BIG!" Yet, they all had me laughing when they tasted it. Some even spit it out they hated it so much. And they eat it nearly everyday. Noraml.
A few days later men were doing work on my house. As a treat I figure I'd pass around the bag of gummi bears my Grandma sent me. The first problem was in explaining the "bear" to them, since they don't exist here. The 40-60 year old men were so excited they nearly attacked me for them. Some spit them out, some were totally amazed by them.
After the gummi bears teh women in my concession were insisting I had to feed all teh men lunch. I kept ignoring them knowing I didnt' have to. But finally one fo the chief' wives (he has 3) handed me an enormous pot and serving tray. So, I went to my house and announced to teh men I'll be cooking an American lunch. There were so excited they finished the work quickly in anticipation. I cooked up a bush version of spinach tuna casserole and watched them eat, all 11 of them. Except for one, they all liked it and told everyone in the village about the "American meal" they ate. Unfortunately, I don't have enough to feed all 1000 villagers that keep demanding i cook for them....

Now it's off to Hamdallaye for more training for a few weeks....which means hamburgers in Niamey on the weekends...